But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head and wash thy face;
That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward you openly.
MATTHEW 6:17-18
I decided I needed to spend some time in prayer and fasting myself and completed a 3-day fast, water only. It was my first time doing it so I wasn’t sure what to expect. The first day was fine but the second day? I got up and barely had the energy to stand. I’d just finished listening to a video on fasting the night before where Vladimir Savchuck commented that if you feel you it’s too hard, ask the Holy Spirit for help. But do not give up. So, I sat on my bed and prayed ‘Holy Spirit, please give me the strength I need to finish this fast’ and I made up my mind that I would not quit. Moving on to the floor and leaning against the bed, I slowly dozed off. It was only for about twenty minutes as my daughter came in asking where something was for school. I got up slowly and to my surprise, I felt strength back. This was also the day I prayed through our home like a power-house. I have never prayed like that before! But it was necessary and we need to war in the spirit often – let the devil know he can’t have our homes or our families. We belong to the Living God!
I heard it said that we often try to fix a spiritual problem in the physical realm and I wonder if I’m guilty of that with John? It is hard not to get rubbed the wrong way when someone is continually doing things that upset you. You immediately think they just don’t care or their apologies aren’t worth a thing. But maybe we need to go deeper. Maybe we need to look at what’s behind them – a spirit of rejection? Fear? Lying? Of course, in order to get delivered a person has to want deliverance. So what do you do in the meantime? Pray and hope their deliverance comes quickly?
I honestly don’t know on that one.
John has a temper and there is definitely a spirit of anger there. But I also know he has suffered rejection from his parents and maybe part of his behaviour is self-preservation – as in, he kept sexting as a back-up for when he felt the inevitable would come and I’d leave him to. Who knows? But at what point do we take some responsibility for ourselves? Yes, the enemy is working against us constantly but isn’t that why we were told to pray without ceasing? To put on the whole armour of God so we can withstand the wiles of the devil? If we’re not using the tools God gave us then yes, we are susceptible to temptation and falling. Thank God for His grace and mercy and being so ready to forgive us when we mess up.
I finished my fast and am no clearer on where to go with John. I did have a breakthrough with regards to spiritual warfare though and feel the peace of so much time in the presence of God. Definitely got to do this more.
John got up early and immediately switched on the tv after his shower. It saddened me that the high he said he’d felt is not being maintained but at the same time, I think ‘who am I to judge?’
I’ll leave you with this:
Depart from me, all ye workers of iniquity; for the LORD hath heard the voice of my weeping.
The LORD hath heard my supplication; the LORD will receive my prayer.
PSALM 6:8-9
Maybe you’re like me – waiting for an answer that hasn’t come yet. Keep waiting. Keep listening. God sees our tears and hears our hearts. He has received our prayers and He will answer.
Love and blessings
Ana x
Steadfast Love 